Entry Two

I have never experienced a single failure in my entire life. My existence has been nothing less than a continuous series of successes and achievements that will never end, because I am in fact a reptilian Illuminati entity that will never die. With that being said I think it's pretty obvious that I experience failure all the time, and I'm not complaining. It is impossible to wake up everyday and accomplish ones every task and desire with precision and grace. As much as it may seem like some people posses this ability in their lives, they don't. It does not exist. Or maybe it does, if you are religious. When I was a kid I played a lot of sports mainly baseball and basketball, I was not particularly good at either. It used to bother me when I was really young, but I quickly realized that I didn't care about being good. I played those sports all the way through middle school, and I had fun, because if I wasn't having fun, I wouldn't be there. I was on some winning teams, and lots of losing teams, I learned that to me it really didn't matter that much. Once I stopped caring about winning so much as a kid I actually got better at some sports too. The same thing would happen to me later in middle school, when I became obsessed with playing guitar and would frequently spend hours in my room sweating over Frank Zappa guitar solos and jazz guitar wizardry, trying to figure out how to do it on my own. I obviously couldn't (and still can't.) If I had never experiences these failures I wouldn't have learned that you can't set insane expectations for yourself, and if you do, you do so knowing that (at least for the short term) you won't achieve them. Or maybe you will. I don't want to sound discouraging. This entry just got really self aware and uncomfortable. I should seriously just stick to the whole reptilian Illuminati shtick.